So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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