But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
