do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
