Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
