I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize