I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We are two peas in an std pod
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
