I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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