Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
