So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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