just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
