sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
