...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
