I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
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