We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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