I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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