spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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