I wannas sexs uuuuu
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize