your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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