I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
50% drunk capacity currently
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
