what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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