Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
