So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
