Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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