Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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