I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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