do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Shame - the story of my life.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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