I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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