why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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