in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
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