She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
