At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
