After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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