She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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