the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
