To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
