dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Randomize
