then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
