I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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