Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
