I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
