Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
