he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
They have beer where we have blood.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
