Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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