Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
