Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
