Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
