His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
