Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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