I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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