Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize