Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
